this morning tommy woke up with the alarm for some reason. he sleeps through it as soundly as i do most mornings. but this morning was special. as he fussed around the bed alternating between nursing, dozing and fussing because he wasn't sure if he wanted to be awake or asleep, i laid still and played sleep, hoping he would catch on and fall into a sound sleep.
instead he turned and started crawling to the foot end of the bed. roundabouts my knee, he stopped moving. fearing a…Continue
i'm on the phone with my cousin that used to watch tommy. tommys grunting and his face is turning red and his eyes are popping out of his head. i get it. he's tryin to force one out. i hear nothing and i smell nothing so i continue with the conversation. and tommy's meal. half an hour goes by. i consider getting ready for bath time but decide on waiting a while out of sheer laziness. completely forgetting about the red face and grunting, i let tommy loose on my bedroom floor.
much like babies get fussy and and don't sleep well when they're hitting milestones, i think i hit one myself. negative nancy took over and i've been glum and complainy for quite a while now. didn't i used to appreciate things?? aside from the fact that i am not happy about where i am in life, i hate my job, it's a struggle to either cook and eat, clean or shower, my house looks like a bomb blew up in it, my room mate moved out(well, that's def a good thing), i still don't have daycare…Continue