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Moms with Stepchildren

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Moms with Stepchildren

This is a group for moms who have their own children as well as stepchildren. Meant for questions on how to keep it balanced and avoid becoming the dreaded Wicked Stepmother!

Members: 75
Latest Activity: Nov 11, 2014

Discussion Forum

Not sure how to title this....

Started by DanielleG. Last reply by lauram2000 Aug 6, 2013. 9 Replies

I have a 12 yo step daughter that doesn't live with us.  My son's baptism is coming up and I made the comment that I wanted a picture of my kids, meaning my biological children.  My bf got mad…Continue

CRAZY EX BABY MAMAS!!

Started by Le$$ay*Alexander2012. Last reply by Lorisa Sep 2, 2012. 3 Replies

My boyfriend and I now have a newborn baby girl that is 3mos old! He also has a daughter from a previous relationship that is 4yrs old.  While I was pregnant his daughter was very excited and all she…Continue

How Do I Deal?

Started by NewMomma. Last reply by Le$$ay*Alexander2012 May 9, 2012. 2 Replies

I am 23 years old and I have a 6 month old baby girl and my fiance also has a 4 year old daughter who we get half of the time and I have been taking care of her since she was 2 and a half. The…Continue

Stepmom to 3 1/2 yo

Started by Terpmom318 Feb 3, 2012. 0 Replies

My stepdaughter is from my fiance's previous relationship. I have been in her life for 2 years now and we've always had a great relationship. Then for the past 2 weekends we have gotten her she's…Continue

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Comment by Kasie on June 10, 2012 at 5:36pm
Hi I'm kasie. I have a 21 yo step son and a 17 yo step daughter. My step daughter lived with us up until thursday. She moved out while we weren't home and left her dad a note saying she moved in with her boyfriend and she feels like she's grown and can take care of herself but she has never worked a day in her life. I worry about her but at the same time I want her to see that she didn't have it as bad as she thinks she did here. She is the type of girl that thinks she has to have her nails done and pedicures on a regular basis. Wears miss me jeans and thinks she has to have a new pair of $200 boots once a year. I swear she has more clothes and shoes than me and my 3 boys put together but she never has enough. She didn't take her phone or her car. Which were the only things we had leverage over. Her dad is so upset and brokenhearted. I'm upset and feel like its my fault. We were getting close for awhile and then I don't know what happened she just shut me out and has done nothing but try to cause fights between her dad and I. She would only come around and be civil with me when I was going to spend a little bit of money on her. Thanks for listening. I just needed to get it off of my chest.
Comment by DanielleG on March 2, 2012 at 1:08pm

Bethany Ann, I was with him and she was pregnant and even had her before I knew it happened, I actually found out on Christmas Eve I was heartbroken because I had wanted another child when we were married and he told me that 2 was enough, that we had our boy and girl.  This woman doesn't take her to the dr. she used the emergency room so every month we can count on 1 or 2 notices from the insurance company.  Schools have even accused her of having Munchausen's there's different types it seems like shes got the one that doesn't poison her kid.  She's NEVER worked and just sits and collects child support, her house is absolutely disgusting and she's got Sarah thinking that she's always got to be there to take care of her mother.  She told Jon (her dad) that she wants to live with him but she needs to take care of her mom....sad!   Thank you, yes our son is a great blessing.

Comment by DanielleG on March 1, 2012 at 11:30pm

Hi, I'm a step-mom to a 12 yr old girl.  She's from  my ex-husband/current boyfriends fling when we were going through our divorce, yes I said divorce, but we are together again.  Now that I have Justin it's hard for me to adapt now, if that makes any sense. I love her to death and she does have developmental problems so she's actually like 8 yrs old mentally, her other handicap is her mother.  I feel guilty sometimes when I say things like "she better not be sick, when she comes over here" and that's just because I have a 11 1/2 week old baby that I don't need to get sick....there's other things, not that I have ever been mean to her and I do want to have her away from her mother who is a complete idiot, put it this way Sarah STILL can't wash her hair in the shower without being supervised and when she does shower at home it's maybe 2 times a week, when she's here for the weekend she's showered every day.  So that's a brief part of my story....

Comment by mommymanda2010 on January 13, 2012 at 11:19am

thank you sabrina and bethany you guys have a lot of gud advise :)

Comment by Sabrina on January 13, 2012 at 12:22am
This is tough, more things are in play here, I really hate that u & ur son are getting this kinda treatment, blended families are so hard, if he doesn't want u parenting then maybe calmly suggest that u go stay elsewhere while kids are visitng, u don't feel like its a family unit even trying to function, especially if he shows his disapproval of ur parenting his kids..you have got to be the woman of ur house, he's the man right, well u have a role to, just like him..bottom line is just having the respect, love, & compassion for each other & calmly let him know, that's not what u or lil man is getting..the love & compassion he feels for his kids should be no different than love & compassion he feels for u & y'alls son... He does care & maybe don't like being told he don't, use another angle...say, what else can I do to help, we are a team, not just sit by the sidelines & watch all this chaos happen, not healthy environment for any of you..hope it helps..
Comment by mommymanda2010 on January 12, 2012 at 11:46pm

we dont have them taht offten anymore he just goes to his exs to see them and sumtimes he takes our son to play so i kinda see from what you said but then again hes just letting them learn to get away with stuff 

Comment by mommymanda2010 on January 12, 2012 at 11:15pm

thanks ive tried and he gets mad at me when i say they need to be punished or try to do anything about it he just says their not doing anything wrong and its everytime only once did he punish him along with me and that was when i was tring to help his son with homework and he refused to try on it and i told him he wasnt getting up until he read the story and i would help im with the words if he needed me to and he still dint do it but started cring but it sumtimes seems like they mean more to him cuz hes alwaying bitching when i wanna get my son something but its fine for him to by them something  im soo confused 

Comment by Sabrina on January 12, 2012 at 10:52pm
Wow, seems like he's just dumped the parenting in your lap, being a blended family I have learned is the most difficult thing I've ever encountered, always a roller coaster of emotions & actions..this did happen to me with my stepson who is now 14, I had to sit & calmly tell him that I loved him alot & so sorry for the hurtful things he's went through, but his disrespect toward me will not change the outcome of those hurtful things, my children don't disrespect his dad, so he need not to me either..that seemed to work, now its another ballgame, he tries to keep his dad from spending time with me or his 2 yr. old lil brother..never know what to expect, think I'm gonna write a book,now, the husband punishing the 18 month old, its easier & he acts like he has no clue how to deal with his own, maybe calmly do ur own punishing to the step son & if he says something, just calmly say Ohh, I just thought u needed some help, ok then..you got this punishment.. best of luck!!
Comment by mommymanda2010 on January 12, 2012 at 9:38pm

im a mom to a 18 month old boy and i have 2 step children an 8 year old boy and a 3 year old girl idk what to do b/c me and my step son got along gud when me an my fiance got together but now he alot a sudden stoped listening and calls me a bitch under his breath and my fiance dont really say anything about it its also hard because when my stepkids dont listen or do something bad its like no big deal he tells them thats bad and says sit down and dont care if they get back up but yet if our 18 month old does something bad he has no problem to jump up and punish him why is this

Comment by Mommy of twins on January 4, 2012 at 5:57pm
I am a first time mommy of twins boys, I also a step mom to a 8 year old boy. I have been with my fiancé for 5 years and have seen his son grow up since he was 3. Before I had my own kids I treated him like my own would do anything for him, and still will. I try and make him feel special especially with the new additions to our family, don't want him to feel left out. He is a great big brother, helps me out when I need him
 

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