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TEMPER TEMPER
Recently my 5 Year old has been having HORRIBLE temper fits. She's yelling Screaming flipping around on the floor like a fish out of water, all of a sudden started getting this tone in her voice that sounds like a 18 year old screaming using words like Liar and Rude and Loser... She stomps and slams doors and very rarely listens....
I refuse to hit my child!!! I take away toys, Take away special times (i.e Computer time, Big Sister day Out, TV time) I have tried a reward system I have tried so much and I'm out of Idea's-
She ONLY does this at home. Or when Myself or her Father are around...She's seeking attention I am big on positive reinforcement and encouraging.... I would like to turn the negative attitude into positive and maybe the attention would be more happy I guess you would say... I am so tired of yelling and clearing out her room! HELP!
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Maggie on -
Send her to her room without discussion. Tell her she can come out when she's calm. If she wails loudly from her room (which is what mine likes to do), ignore it. Go about your business. If she leaves her room, the first time tell her, "Stay in your room until you are ready to control your temper." If she comes out again, don't say anything, but pick her up, carry her to her room and set her down and close the door. Repeat until she stays. This is the process my mother taught me to use with my girls and it works. It doesn't require any sort of physical punishment and offers no attention for such behavior. The first few times will take forever. I remember my daughter coming out of her room several times and feeling weary at the thought of having to carry her back there. Eventually, they realize you're going to win in the end, so they give up.
You could also try a chart system. "For each day that I don't have to send you to your room, you'll get a sticker. When you get 10 stickers, we'll go out for ice cream just the two of us."
As a side note, our older daughter is nearly seven, and we had to cut out Disney channel entirely due to some of the attitude and language she was picking up. Some of the shows that they have on channels that are supposedly kids channels are really not appropriate for small kids (even though the ratings suggest otherwise.) I mention this because you brought up liar, rude and loser and those are some of the things that caused us to illiminate Disney Channel from our TV watching.
Some of it is probably just growing pains. My (almost) seven year-old went through the same thing around age five. Hang in there. They do turn back into their charming little selves.
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Permalink Reply by Brenda ortiz-Allard on
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hi Claudia my name is Brenda. I have been having a similar issue with my 5 yr old. I went to Target and purchased a white board that says chore chart on it, i have listed things i expect from him such as, 1) no fresh mouth, 2) sit in a chair during meals, 3) no loud feet after dinner (you get the idea) the board came with little stars, if he completes the "chore" he puts up his own star ( which he loves to do) he does not complete the "chore" i put a black "x" in that spot (he doesn't like those very much). Also, if it's meal time and he continues to get out of his chair and run around i just give him a little reminder (umm Keegan if you want to earn your star you need to stay in your chair) If he chooses to keep getting up then i place the black "x" and if he questions me on it i just say "well you chose to keep running around". And i don't get all worked up about it anymore either, I let him chose if he wants a star or not, slowly i have been seeing him make better decisions. I do little rewards, if he has a good week ( more stars then black x's) then he will either get to choose a special dessert from our local bakery that we love or maybe having a special play date or we have done a trip to the movies. On the days he wants to yell and throw a fit i say "u need to go upstairs until you can calm yourself down enough to act the way you are suppose to down here" ( sometimes i have to physically carry him upstairs) but its worth it. He usually calms right down now, I only had to do it twice for him to know I wasnt playing. Well i hope you find a solution that works for you soon, good luck!
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