So I have this friend with a child. The child 9 months old. She can't stand. She can't hold a bottle. She is slow at everything. If you change her diaper, clothes, touch her, bath her, or look at her she screams like you are beating her. Anyone have any tips? Or know what could be wrong?
It sounds like she has some developmental delays and a sensory processing disorder. It isn't necessarily autism. Your friend needs to schedule an appointment with a Developmental Pediatrician. That's a specialist who has experience making diagnoses that your regular pediatrician doesn't deal with.
My son has autism, and your description sounds nothing like how he was. At 9 months old my son was starting to walk. Every kid is different, but I'd guess it was probably something other than autism. Either way, she needs to be seen by a specialist sooner rather than later.
That might be part of the problem right there... she might not be getting enough interaction or chances to be mobile so she can learn and develop into what she is capable of. Maybe the time she does get out, the last thing she probably wants is to be confined again for a diaper change, bath, etc... and thus the screaming. I don't know, but she might just be screaming out of frustration. I had a friend whose baby was pulling out her own hair. The doctor said it was some form of frustration... she later found out the babysitter at that time was keeping her in a back room confined to a play pen most of the day (it was horrible!!).
you ever hear of failure to thrive? when babies felt unloved and are left alone alot they can stop developing only a dr could tell u whats wrong...
Someone needs to take the baby to a doctor or specialist. It could be that she is not getting the right attention or interaction but it could also be something else physical. Some babies who have vitamin deficiency or another type of disorder can be misdiagnosed and if she is crying by just touching her, it could be something like that and she is in pain. Either way, please have your friend seek a professional soon! Good luck.
Based on what I've read here, I'd have to agree with the lack of interaction/attention. Some parents don't realize that kids will not just learn things on their own. My stepson's sister scooted around on her butt until she was almost 2 years old, she never made an attempt to stand/crawl, and her mother never worked with her. There was nothing developmentally wrong with her, she just didn't get the attention she needed. My SIL's daughter is 5 and has a speech impediment, her tongue is thick so her words come out dutch-sounding and it's very hard to understand her, but my sil still has not taken her to be evaluated.
I'm glad you are concerned about your friend's daughter. I would suggest talking to her about working more with her (or be more subtle and do it yourself, so the friend will see that your efforts make an impact on her development). It's also important that she be evaluated by a doctor to rule out any delays. Have you suggested that to her? How would she respond to that?
That's a real shame! That poor baby girl. I know it may not be classified as abuse, and I know you said she's a friend of yours, but have you considered getting somebody legal involved? Maybe explain everything to your pediatrician and see if they would recommend CPS or somebody check into what's going on. Not that the baby should be taken away exactly, but maybe having an authority figure tell them to step it up will give them a little wake up call. It breaks my heart to see a parent have a child, and then put them aside like they're an inconvenience! Just keep yourself involved with that baby. She will absorb things from you, and from your kids, and will thrive a little more from your positive energy. She needs it from wherever she can get it!