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She wants me, she wants me not...

I can't seem to figure out why Morganna doesn't want to take naps with me anymore. We used to curl up together in my bed or on a pallet on the floor and pass out easily for an hr or two but now she fights and claws and screams if I'm next to her, or if I put her in her crib she cries til I leave the room. BUT, if her dad lies down with her for a nap she goes quietly, hardly a fuss, and only if she sees that I have left the room. I'm a little hurt but should I be? Is my presence disruptive to her calm and peace? I'm a SAHM and I spend nearly all her waking hrs with her, feeding, playing, traveling, etc. I'm wondering if she thinks that's why we shouldn't be going to sleep, because I mean playtime or activity time. Anyone else facing a similar issue? How do you handle it?

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Permalink Reply by Jen, Mom365 Host on July 22, 2012 at 4:22pm

How old is she? Babies and kids go through all sorts of phases, so I wouldn't take it personally. My son tells me every night that he wants daddy to get him to sleep because he knows that if Daddy gets him to sleep it means that Daddy will fall asleep and wind up sleeping in bed with him. If I get him to sleep, I don't stay.

There might be something else going on. Do you snore or talk in your sleep? It could be that you scared your daughter without knowing it, and she's reacting to that. It could be that she's expressing some independence, too. It could be anything, it could be nothing, either way, take it as a compliment. If she wants to be by herself to sleep, take it in stride knowing that you did everything you could to teach her that you would always be there for her, which gave her enough strength to be independent so young!.

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Permalink Reply by Tristina on July 22, 2012 at 8:16pm

She's only almost 10 months! I don't snore but her dad does, but he always stays and I usually get up and leave at some point. I used to be able to nurse get to sleep but that stopped as well unless she is super tired, and even then she whines a little when I put her in the crib or take her off my breast.

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Permalink Reply by Jen, Mom365 Host on July 24, 2012 at 9:00pm

Hmm. Is she trying to change her nap routine? Maybe she just isn't tired and is ready to drop one of her naps. How many times a day are you trying to get her to nap?

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Permalink Reply by EastTexasMommy on July 24, 2012 at 12:42am

I have always put my daughter in her own room and bed alone at bed/nap time. I stay at home all day and she is 100% mom till dad comes home and she is daddy's girl. She will not nap with me or lay and watch a movie. (she's 2.5yrs) She will with her daddy. But she will ONLY sleep alone.

This has often upset me b/c sometime I still want to hold my baby. But it's great that she has her independence. Accept that. You'll appreciate it later when she gets older. Imagine a 7yr old that still needs to sleep with mommy. It is hard to get adjusted to. Especially since you have such a close bond being a stay at home mom and her primary source of food for so long.

Let her have some bonding with dad. Encourage her to sleep alone. You will get your own free time during her nap time. Missing an old hobby??? Wanting to start a new one???

There are stages when she will skip naps and then start back. Everything you said sounds normal. Sounds like you're doing a great job. Don't stress, everyday she is growing and changing. Time to stress is teenage years. (16, 2, & due Oct.)