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Help.. he uses me as a pacifier!
I need help..trying to ween my son from using my boob as a paci...I didn't mind up until now...he is 3 1/2 months now....@ bed I start him off in his pack n play next to my bed.....I would bring him into my bed to BF him and that's where he would stay the rest of the night...he uses my boob to pacify and wakes up when it comes out and fusses until he finds it again....I'm over it and want to start transitioning him to sleep in his pack n play after feedings... then next goal is his crib in his room. He will NOT take a paci...it makes him cry harder when I try to give it to him...so what do I do? He screams if I don't give him my Boob...I tried this transition last night and I can honestly say its my first sleepless night since he's been born. What have I created lol
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Jen, Mom365 Host on -
My kids were both like that, and that's why we co-sleep. My son was in our bed until he weaned at 20 months. My daughter is 19 months and still in bed with us. It's not ideal, but it works for us.
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Permalink Reply by Kat on -
Carrie - we JUST went through this and our son is about the same age. Co-sleeping can be a great thing, but not necessarily for everyone. I missed being able to be next to my husband and he felt paralyzed sleeping next to our son out of fear of rolling over on him. But our situation was the same thing. He would start out in his crib, then when he'd first cry i'd bring him into bed with me where I'd pacify him for the rest of the night.
We decided about a week and a half ago to wean him.. We used the Baby Whisperer's book (Tracy Hogg) to develop our plan. We first developed a sleeping routine: we turn on one specific lullaby that plays on repeat, we say goodnight to everything in the room, we close the blinds, say goodnight to the light, and then either feed or rock him to sleep.
The difficult part was exactly what you're going through... it took us 4 nights of being up and down, but we stayed adamant and did not let him back in our bed. If he cried, we'd pick him up and then put him down after he was soothed (CIO is not for our family). My husband and I did split shifts, he took 9pm - 2am and I took 2am until the morning. He was literally up every 10-30 minutes. It was hell.
What I did differently on the 5th night was put a stuffed animal that I've always had in his crib, so it had my scent on it. Since that night, he only gets up once or twice to eat and will go back down. I know this goes against all of the SIDS recommendations, but I just keep it far enough away from him so it doesn't smother him, use your discretion if this is for you.
It's now been 1.5 weeks since we first started and last night our little champ slept in his own crib from 8:30pm - 8:30am with one feeding at 5:30a.
You can get through this - I was in your shoes feeling like I had never had such crappy sleep, but the book we read said it takes 3-5 days to break a habit, you just have to stand your ground.
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Permalink Reply by Carrie F on -
Thank you so much for sharing your info. and experience. I'm going to get the book and try it. I have to get strong again...because I have let him win.
Thank you so much. Question...I EBF so how can my DH help? Should the baby still eat every 3 hours? He has never had a bottle and I haven't pumped....makes it harder on me :o(
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Permalink Reply by Kat on
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When my husband helped, he did not feed him, we made sure to "tank him up" (the book talks about this) and felt like he had gotten enough food until my "shift;" DH would try to calm him down in other ways, rocking, pacifier, etc. But it was hard for sure.
The biggest piece of advice an LC gave me once was "YOU are important too." As mom's we "let them win" as you said because we love them so much we'd sacrifice everything for them. But our LO's don't know any better and only know what we teach them. I'm crossing my fingers for a quick transition for you. Keep me posted!!!
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Permalink Reply by Carrie F on
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If ONLY he would take a paci....he's a totally different child @ night. He goes into hysterics looking for my boob...and he won't stop until he gets it. I will let you know when he try this :o)
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Permalink Reply by Carrie F on
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well, thanks for bumping this back up and asking about how things are going. We moved him into his own room 3 weeks ago. He's still waking up every 2-3 hrs. to eat and pacify. I have however seen baby steps....he's not going into hysterics as crazy as they were...still having them but not as bad. I think we are making baby steps. We went camping last week and he slept through the night one of the nights in his pack n play and I was beyond elated. It was short lived though lol. He's been waking 2 hrs after he goes to sleep @ night...then sleeps about 4-5 hrs. after that.
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