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Considering not finding out the sex of the baby
This is baby #3 for us and our last. We have two boys and we found out w/ both what we were having. My DH and I are seriously thinking about not finding out w/ this one...since this is our last one we will never have another chance for a surprise. I figured that if it's a boy...we have everything...and if it is a girl...DH will have to do a speedy run to BRU for girlie stuff lol. I would be having a welcome home shower @ my house after the baby is born IF it's a girl...for a boy...we would not have a shower because we already had two showers and pretty much have everything. What do you all think? I know it's ultimately up to us but my mom keeps saying..."you can't do that to us"!
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Sabrina on -
Sounds like high hopes for a girl, either way holding out will not change the outcome..u didn't mention if u actually wanted to be surprised the 2 times b4..don't matter, I would find out, it will drive u nuts, added tension & stress is not good..knowing u really want a girl..best wishes on a princess!!! {:
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Permalink Reply by krystal hager on -
Ive always wanted to try the whole being surprised thing but never wanted to get stuck with all the yellows. I'd rather have either the pink or blue lol. I'd say you should have your mom, his mom or a close friend that can keep a secret, come with you to your sono appt. let the doctor tell who ever you chose what your having but NOT tell you.. Again this person has to be able to keep a secret lol. Then they can throw you alittle shower if need be n have all the girl or boy stuff.
A friend of mine actually thought of that idea and she didn't find out what she was having til like a week before the baby was here. Very exciting for her, plus we all thought it was a very cute idea!
Good luck!!
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Permalink Reply by Carrie F on -
That is a really good idea. I was already thinking about having the ultrasound put in an envelope and giving it to a friend and maybe have a dessert party and the inside of the cake can revile what the gender is...or do it the old fashion way and just wait until the baby arrives.
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Permalink Reply by Carrie F on
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Of course I would LOVE to have a girl :o) We did not want to be surprised w/ the last two...and we never considered not finding out w/ them....this time around knowing that it's our last and we have never had a surprise..this is it..our only chance. I like the thought of the anticipation but know it would be a long 9 months of not knowing. I think I can do this...but I can easily see myself caving @ the sono because the curiosity would be getting to me...I can conquer this haha
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Permalink Reply by krystal hager on
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I would cave in but it seems like such a fun surprise! The cake idea is really cute too! I think you should try waiting and it's not like you have to wait the whole 9 months. Just wait long enough to where it's exciting to you but not driving you crazy lol
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Permalink Reply by Carrie F on
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your right..only 6 more to go teehehehehe. I can do this..I "think I can.
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Permalink Reply by Dana M on -
When my husband and I got pregnant with our first baby, he already had
two boys from his first marriage. He REALLY wanted a little girl. I told him
it would be better to not know what we were having, not because I thought
he'd be really disappointed, but rather because if we waited until the baby
was born, he would be excited either way. In our case, no one knew what
we were having, not even the doctor. We said we didn't want to know, so
during the ultrasounds, they simply avoided getting anywhere near that
area. When the baby was born, the doctor had me look to see what we'd
had, and we did get our little girl! On our next (and last!) pregnancy, I did
let him find out. We were starting over, as we hadn't planned on having
another baby, then changed our mind. We had a little boy the second time
around. I didn't mind not getting a certain color the first time. I got yellow,
green, white, beige, all the neutrals. People were surprised we didn't
find out, but it worked out fine in the end!
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Permalink Reply by Mommy is the best word :) on
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I did not find out and although both our families weren't to happy it was the right choice for me I wanted the surprise and honestly after wondering for 9 months and hrs in labor and delivery when she finally came out to hear them says "Its a girl" was the most wonderful surprise ive ever had. I will admit waiting was hard as far as buying things everything was neutral and it is definately NOT for everyone but in my case it was the right choice for me and I stand by the decision I made although I do think I will be finding out with my next one but I havent made a 100% decision as of yet. And as far as girlie things EVERYONE who came to the hospital brought pink and purple stuff because they were so happy to finally be able to go shopping for a specific gender once they found out it was a girl so you probably wont have to worry to much about not having enough girlie outfits just buy 2 girlie outfits and 2 boy outfits and youll be all set in the hospital for either outcome. Good luck in whatever you choose to do.
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Permalink Reply by Susan Lusignan on
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Don't find out!!! I didn't find out with my first two years ago and although it drove other people crazy, it was definitely the best thing in the world to hear the baby was girl after hours of emergency surgery, etc...I'm now pregnant with my second and my husband wants to know, so I just assumed we would find out, but as the day of the ultrasound got closer, I realized how much I really didn't want to know and how much I did want that motivation of not knowing for the delivery process. My husband heard me out and agree not to find out. I have the envelop with the gender hidden, but it is easy for me because I don't want to know.
I would not worry about all the "stuff" too. We only get a shower once, so the car seat, pack n play, etc...I have are neutral from the first time and people will bring tons of pink or blue stuff once the baby is born. You will not be overloaded with white, green, and yellow.
I love waiting! and if you think you are going to cave, just remember that this is the last time you can have this experience if you are done having kids:)
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Permalink Reply by Carrie F on
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My appt. is set for Feb. 10th and hubs said nope..not finding out. This is probably going to be really hard but I'm praying I can do this. I figured that I will wash all the boy clothes from 1-3 months then have the hubs to a fast run to BRU if it's a girl to get an outfit.
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Permalink Reply by Mommyof4 on -
I want to be surprised too but I want to have one of each gender before I'm surprised so I feel prepared either way. If a quick girl-clothes run is good with you go for it. It's much better to not have regrets about being surpised than to try to please someone else. Tell mommy that she can get two sets of clothes for the LO and have fun dreaming of her new grandbaby in both of them - twice as much fun! Go for it girl. If you know it's gonna be your last do what you want to do with it and tell mommy - no. She can't make you have that ultrasound to find out and no one will tell without your permission. Enjoy your surprise!
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Permalink Reply by MamaB on
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We didn't find out either time. I always knew I didn't want to know the 1st time- there are no surprises in life and I wanted to be surprised. I didn't even give hubby the option because baby was in me so my decision was final. Everyone was annoyed that we didn't find out because they couldn't buy gender specific things but we didn't want that anyway because we planned to have at least 2 kids and wanted neutral stuff. Actually we didn't get alot of clothes because it was hard to even find gender neutral clothes- maybe not the case now. But it was definitely fun going shopping for girl clothes after she was born! The 2nd time actually my husband didn't want to find out so since I made him wait the 1st time, I waited for him. He was hoping for a boy and I wanted a sister for my daughter. I got my wish and we have 2 girls. If we have another I think I would find out- to try something different.
I have to admit both times at the ultrasounds, I was ready to cave and find out. But the 1st time I kept reminding myself how fun it would be to find out in a few months. The 2nd time I wouldn't even think about it out of respect for my husband. So I say, be strong and do what you really want to do. It really is neat to hear the dr pronounce the gender after months of waiting. Everyone else will survive- just tell them, "Baby is in me so I get to make the decisions." Good luck! :-)
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